You have no private thoughts. You think you do, but you don’t!
You think your mind is like Las Vegas. You think “what happens in my mind stays in my mind.” Well, it doesn’t.
All of your thoughts manifest in physical, outward behaviors.
If you’ll step outside of your thoughts for a moment–something you should do you regularly–and just observe them and how you behave when you think them, you’ll see what I mean.
For example: You have certain thoughts about your boss at work. You don’t like him. You think he is self-centered, egotistical, and is only interested in how much money he can make from you and others. You think he doesn’t care about you as a person, doesn’t care about your feelings or personal life. You think you are stuck in this job and just have to put up with him because you have no other options. You also think he has no idea you think these things about him because you have never spoken these thoughts out loud to another soul–not to other coworkers, not even to your best friend!
Guess what? He knows. So does everyone you interact with at work and at home!
Every time he walks into the room, your body stiffens, but you try to hide it by smiling an insincere smile or by asking him how he is today. You can’t wait until one of you can leave the room! When he doesn’t, you breathe a sigh of relief and roll your eyes. The before and after energy your body radiates is noticeable to everyone!
Even outside of work, the mere thought or mention of his name causes the same feeling of resentment within you. You think your friends and family don’t notice, but they do–just like you notice when your friends think or talk about someone they dislike.
A different example: There’s someone else at work about whom you think completely different thoughts. You really like her. She’s funny and always has something positive to say about life another people. You think she cares deeply about you has a person and thinks of you as a very close friend. You have very positive thoughts about her family and personal life. You think you share many of the same interests–books, movies, food, recreation, etc.
While you haven’t specifically told her what you think about her, you are fairly sure she knows. Guess what? She does, and so does everyone around you!
Every time she walks into the room, your face broadens with a big, sincere smile. Your body posture both straightens and relaxes. Your entire body language becomes more animated. You ask how she is doing because you really want to know. When she leaves the room, you feel better just for having been in her presence for those few minutes. The energy your body radiates is noticeable to everyone!
And another curious thing happens: when your boss comes up to you immediately after you’ve been in the presence of the one you like, it actually takes a few minutes for your energy to shift. During those few minutes, you do not stiffen and fake the smile to your boss. You still feel relaxed–if only for a few minutes.
You cannot hide your thoughts because every thought produces energy which radiates out of you and produces physical behaviors.
You can, however, control and modify your thoughts.
The most important thing to remember about your thoughts is that they are just objects, like a pen, a photograph, or a vile of acid. When you detach your “self” from your thoughts and regain the awareness that thoughts are just objects, you are free to choose which ones to pick up, and which ones to leave alone. You always have the power to choose!
It is also important to notice that the negative thoughts you hold for another person usually do not change the other person. The thoughts only have a negative impact on you and your quality of life. This awareness should make it easier for set those objects down and pick up ones that produce more desirable feelings for you.
Isn’t good to know you have the power to choose?
Here’s to your newly discovered super-power!